How To Have A Bad Day 101

I am here to share the secrets of 'how to have a bad day.'  You may THINK you know....but you have no idea.

1) Wake up early. 
     Preferably sometime between 6 and 7 AM....also make sure that you went to bed extremely late the night before.  That way, you are completely exhausted and even less able to handle awful happenstances.

2) Make sure it is winter outside.
    This may not make any sense to you, dear reader, quite yet.  But continue reading so that you might fully understand.  Winter=5 degree weather, icy roads and is prime opportunity for car accidents and other such undesirable instances.

3) Have an extremely unproductive morning in terms of school.
    This will cause tension in your life, it will also cause you to take a much needed break, which leads to my next point.


4) Leave the house.
     Leave. Go out.  Do something in a place which is not your home.  Preferably some place surrounded by icy, dirt roads.

5) After procrastinating sufficiently, head home....OH! And get in a fender bender.
  
6) Make sure that the person driving in front of you is someone who is important to you.


7) Make sure the person driving in front of Important Person decides to slam on their brakes.


8) Make sure Important Person slams on their brakes and swerves out of way.


9) Make sure you slam on brakes, have no escape route as the two people in front of you are blocking the whole road.


10) Make sure ABS kicks in and makes it impossible to stop.


11) Make sure you go home and suffer from shock
      To properly suffer from shock, hyperventilate and cry non-stop for approximately 2 hours.

12) Make sure you are a girl going through an emotionally trying period of time.


13) Attempt to do more school.

14) Become distraught.


15) Make sure your mother decides to host approximately 15 crazy little girls for an American Girl Doll group.


16) Make sure one of the few mothers present is the mother of the person you hit.


17) Make sure you feel immensely guilty.
      This requires the person you hit to go into shock as well so that you might feel especially guilty. Also make sure your father is completely understanding...that is the final blow.

18) Fall down the stairs.


19) Break your iPod.


20) Be a beautiful disaster/hot mess...whatever you decide to label yourself.

And this, my dear reader, is how, as a high school student, you are to suffer a bad day.  There are multiple levels of "Bad Day," this is a moderately bad day...so on a scale from 1-10 in terms of bad day?? This gets MAYBE a 6, more like a 5.  Eventually, once I meet someone unfortunate enough to suffer a 10, I will share their story so that you might be more appreciative of your minuscule issues.

Be good. Have bad days. Smile anyway.

Peace Out,
Beautiful Mess